The Bartender Mommy

I went into a small town honky-tonk bar today to see what I could observe. The first thing that struck my eyes was the fact that I was the only female patron in the place. The only other woman was the bartender. She was blond, about 5”5’ and wore between a size 2 or 4 dress. The other thing I noticed about her was the fact that she had on such a small dress that she indeed had to wear shorts underneath said dress.

At one point she delivered a shot to another much older man who was a patron at the bar. After the bartender, who I learned was named Tori, delivered the shot he went to hug her. She only gave a side-ways hug, but I noticed he took this opportunity to grab her buttocks. My interest was piqued. I couldn’t help but wonder about the man who would do such a thing, and the bartender that would allow such things. So I asked questions.

I found out that the bartender’s name was Tori. I found out that she had a three year-old son and was still with the father of her child. They had been a monogamous relationship since before their son was born. I asked her about the man who grabbed her, she said, “I know the man. He comes in here a lot and I know he is harmless. But if he ever crossed the line I would not let it.”

So what was the line? What line could be crossed? She Said, “You just know. It is hard to explain but once a line is crossed you know it. Then I would have no problem kicking a man out, or simply kicking him.”

Tori has been a bartender for six years. So for six years she has become accustomed to the “hands on” approach that many men take with her. She has had to realize in that for six years she is a fantasy, an object that other men use for their own purposes. She has a son to support. Bills to pay. And she does what she can. I found out through asking her questions that she only has a high school education. Whether or not she graduated, I don’t know. But high school was the most advanced education she had.

But she shows up to work, every day, and let men look, touch, and push the boundaries. She shows up with dresses that are so short that any mystery of her womanhood is no longer much of a mystery. When I asked her if she felt like she was being objectified in any way she said no. Her point was that almost every woman puts on make-up, does her hair, and wear clothes that help accentuate her accents.

I had a chance to ask to the man who was “grabby” toward Tori how he felt. His point was he has been married for 32 years and in those 32 years had never been unfaithful. He said that “Tori was a good girl and if he ever crossed the line she would let you know.” He explained to me that all he did was just in good fun. It was him just “playing” around with her.

But what does that mean? Does that mean that I can go up to a man and start grabbing him and claim that it is nothing but “in good fun?”

Tori acts and dresses in a way that will help ensure her salary. She is a bartender that lives off of tips so dressing in barely there dresses and flirting with men who are old, young, well-groomed, or simply skanky, it doesn't matter. It is how she lives.

So I imagine, at the end of the day she undresses from her work “uniform” takes a shower to get the drunkard man hands off of her, and puts on a comfortable t-shirt and sweat pants. This is when she goes from a woman sex-goddess to mother. And this is the time when she can forget about how she is viewed, forget about the men who drool over her, forget about the role of the flirt that she must play, and simply becomes “mommy”.